A whole roll of Portra 400 coming back that green is wild to me, because Portra usually holds up better than most. That trip must have been a letdown after you were expecting vintage vibes at worst, and checking the date first is just smart. Metering for box speed plus a stop sounds like a solid habit for old stock.

Ha! I had the exact same thing happen with hairspray, I swore it was all sticky junk for years and then a friend who cuts hair told me I was just spraying it from way too far away. Turns out you gotta hold the can like eight inches from your head and do short little bursts, not one long blast across the room like a fire extinguisher. I felt pretty dumb after that one. Dry shampoo was another one I gave up on too early, I was spraying way too much and then wondering why my hair felt like straw. The trick for me was spraying it at night before bed and letting it sit while I slept, then it actually soaks up the oil instead of just sitting on top of your scalp. Funny how one person who knows what they're doing can change your whole mind about something you wrote off years ago.